GODSWAR: The Spear of Athena, Chapter 12

So, Urelle had -- just barely -- survived...

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Chapter 12.

"I think," Quester said, trying to balance gentleness and firmness, "it would be good if you could explain what happened yesterday, when you assisted Frederic."

Urelle looked up from her bed, and Ingram, who was sitting in a chair nearby, glanced to Quester and Victoria. "What happened yesterday?" she asked.

Ingram's brows drew down. "Frederic encountered… difficulty in healing you." The subtle tightness in his voice echoed the fears Quester felt in him, the memory of seeing the young Vantage nigh-dead before them. "He said he needed a … connection to something greater than his magics. I thought about calling Berenike, but before I could, Victoria offered her hand… and somehow that was enough." He looked to Victoria. "She's going to be fine, and that's all I need to know. You don't have to explain anything to me."

Victoria looked around the room, then the right side of her mouth turned up in a half-smile. "It is true that I do not have to," she said after a moment, "but Quester is, I think, right. It would be good for us to have few secrets of import from each other." In the mindspeech, she added, and after all, how well can we hide secrets if we can speak by thoughts? Eventually, I suspect, anything you dwell upon will come out, or at least hint at its nature.

"That is perhaps true," Quester admitted. "But as you are not of the Iriistiik, and accustomed to being alone in your thoughts, perhaps not quite so much as you might think."

"Still… yes, I think you are correct, Quester." A swift procession of emotions flickered like shadows across her face; worry, pride, disbelief, awe, tenderness. "In all honesty, though I knew this secret before, it was something in the manner of a test that I offered my aid to Frederic. I do not think I entirely believed it before then."

"Well, what is it, Auntie?" Urelle said, after a moment's silence.

Victoria shook her head, smiling with that same subtle incredulity; a strand of her black-and-white hair waved, accentuating the motion. "Well… I suppose there's no point in trying to lead up to it. Kyri – your sister Kyri – is Myrionar."

Quester tried to make sense of this fantastic statement, and couldn't. But his, and Ingram's, confusion was nothing compared to Urelle's.

"Wha… Auntie, what?"

"I know precisely what you are feeling, Urelle. But I also know precisely what I am saying. You all recall when we first encountered the Wanderer? How I pointed out that anyone could claim to be a legend, but that I required proof?"

Urelle nodded. "Yes. He said you should pray to Myrionar, and that Myrionar would answer. And when you came back, you said you had been answered, and that this was indeed the Wanderer."

"Yes," Ingram said, brow furrowing again. "And I remember both Quester and I thought you looked… stunned, behind your usual veteran Adventurer face."

"Urelle undoubtedly would have seen the same thing, if the idea of studying with the Wanderer hadn't rather distracted her," Victoria agreed. "Then here is what happened: Myrionar did answer my prayers. Myrionar spoke to me. And It spoke in Kyri's voice."

They stared incredulously at her. Then Quester said, "But – Lady Vantage – this is, after all, a god. I do not doubt that Shargamor or Athena or Terian, or any of them, could speak in the voice of anyone they chose."

"Undoubtedly, Quester," she said, the half-smile still on her face. "But the voice came with the absolute conviction that this was the true voice of Myrionar. And my subsequent conversation with the Wanderer verified it. Kyri is – will become… did become Myrionar. All at once, so to speak."

Quester tried to make sense of this. The god Myrionar had existed for a very long time; after he and Ingram had become employees and, later, friends of the Vantages, Quester had done some studying of their faith, assuming that it would held him understand these friends just as understanding Ingram's faith had aided in understanding the young Camp-Bel. There were some traces indicating that Myrionar had existed many Chaoswars back. Yet Kyri Vantage was young, only a few years older than Urelle; how could she be Myrionar?

Abruptly, Ingram began laughing. "Oh, now it makes sense!"

All three of them stared at Ingram. "I must say that I cannot see how this… unique situation can make sense of anything," Quester said finally.

"Oh, it's all simple, it's a closed time-loop. Some of the Founder's writings talked about this, although it was usually in the context of ancient stories. No, what makes sense now is the 'Vantage Strength'. Kyri becomes Myrionar, and somehow has to go back in history to whenever Myrionar first shows up. But she has to make sure that cycle keeps happening, right? So she has to make sure that the Vantage line shows up…"

"… and since they're her family, they need that touch of godspower that gives them the strength," Victoria finished. "Yes. Yes, that is obvious now." She shook her head again, smiling. "So we've been worshipping our own family. Perhaps we are descended of Kyri, somehow."

"But becoming a god… that's got to be something really difficult," Urelle put in after a moment. "So, that means she has to let all the bad things happen."

Victoria closed her eyes. "Oh, Balance, of course. By all that is, Kyri, how it must hurt, even as a god. The very course of events that made you … you cannot change. Or Myrionar will never exist, and all the good you have do will never come to pass."

Thinking about that terrible concept, and then about their journey, triggered another thought. "I think I understand something else, too."

"What, Quester?" asked Ingram.

"Well… perhaps. We have wondered why our opponents at times seemed confused as to the nature of their target, and especially as to why, instead of you, they appear to be focused on Urelle – or, perhaps, Victoria."

Ingram's eyes widened. "No. Yes. By Athena, yes. It's Urelle. But Victoria's connected to her by the same power. That's why it's confused."

"Would you explain, Ingram?" Victoria asked, polite steel in the words.

"Oh! Sorry. Look, if we're dealing with either a crazy or a fake Ares, either way they've probably done their best to wipe out all of the possible candidates for Athena, or any of the other gods, to incarnate. We've never known what's involved in the selection; but now it seems awfully likely that it's bloodline – incarnate gods have to come from someone who's either been prepared to survive the godspower, or," he looked at Urelle and Victoria, "are born with a connection to it."

"I am not becoming any kind of god!" Urelle said, as firmly as her still-recovering body would let her.

Ingram sighed and looked down. "You already risked everything, I'm not asking you to risk any more."

Quester studied his friends and sensed, delicately, the thoughts and feelings radiating from them. "Urelle, I do not believe your sister planned to become one, either."

"Not the same thing," Victoria said sharply. "If we understand this at all… Kyri has always been Myrionar, in a sense. Myrionar was never anyone else, although It took on the guise It wears for the sake of the justice Kyri fought for. This Athena is her own god, not any of her worshippers."

Quester turned his head towards his friend. "Ingram?"

Ingram shrugged. "I can't argue it directly, Victoria. There was no incarnate Athena in my lifetime. But I have read the histories, pretty carefully. I think… and I admit, it's just my own impression, but I think that the gods don't wipe out the person they incarnate to. She sort of chooses someone who fits with being Athena, and makes them… more of who they are. Yeah, they'll get Athena's knowledge and power, but they're not erased."

"Ingram, the 'knowledge and power' of something that's lived through dozens of Cycles… I couldn't possibly be the same person after I got that!"

"No." Ingram bit his lip. "And I wouldn't ask you to do that."

Urelle stared at him, then smiled. "I know you wouldn't. But now I'm worried about going to Aegeia. Am I going to suddenly just turn into this incarnate goddess as soon as I enter?"

Ingram stared at her, and Quester could feel the conflicting worries churning within his friend. Ingram's oath made it imperative that he return, help his Clan, stop Ares. Yet Ingram's personal attachment – an intense affection, perhaps more that Quester could not precisely sort out – to Urelle was equally powerful. He could not risk his mission, yet nor could he risk Urelle.

And Ingram could not move forward on his mission without Urelle. Even if another Salandaras were willing to lead them, Quester could not imagine that they could simply walk through the Seal. It would take a skilled master of magic to take advantage of the single and singular flaw in the otherwise perfect barrier.

There was silence in the room for several moments.

Victoria shifted, and then looked sharply towards Urelle. "We need answers, it would seem, and the answers lie beyond us."

Urelle looked up; for a moment, Quester saw only puzzlement on her face, but then her eyes widened. "But… I thought that should be saved for desperate moments."

Ingram caught on at the same moment Quester realized what they were talking about. "Wait, no, we shouldn't call him over such a…" he trailed off.

Victoria's eyebrow had lifted, and a small, cutting smile appeared as Ingram stopped. "You were going to say 'trivial matter' or something of the sort, I suppose?"

Ingram nodded, face clearly reddened.

"Well, at least you had the sense to realize your mistake. This is vital. We have questions that must be answered, or we cannot move forward. Yes?"

Ingram exchanged glances with Urelle, and both nodded. "Yes."

"And none of us believe those answers can be found here, yes?"

Quester thought on it, but he agreed with that conclusion. If Ingram didn't know how the incarnations worked, it was highly doubtful the Salandaras would… and these were not ordinary times, in any case. The rules might have changed. "Yes. I do not believe those answers are here," he said, and saw the younger two nod.

"Then we are in need of some means of resolving our questions, or our mission – your mission, Ingram, which has become ours – fails here, and Urelle's efforts truly were for nothing."

Ingram muttered a curse under his breath.

Quester sketched a bow towards the girl in her bed. "Urelle? Would you be willing to try?"

Urelle hesitated, her storm-gray eyes distant. But after a few moments, she nodded. "I think Auntie's right. We don't have any way to answer these questions, but if anyone can, it's him."

She gestured towards the closet where her clothing hung, and a tiny glittering object flew to her hand. She stared down at it, and Quester could feel her tension rising, a tension not unmixed with excitement and anticipation. "I will try to call the Wanderer."